Jaded Vanities

Disturbing. Sexy. Disturbingly sexy. These are the few ways I would describe burlesque show Jaded Vanities showing in The Garden of Unearthly Delights this Adelaide Fringe Festival. If that doesn’t sound appealing to you, I’d say move on to the next article. However, if that does sound particularly appealing to you, I’d suggest reading on…

Jaded Vanities is brought to you by Russall S. Beattie, known for his adult-rated burlesque shows with a notable dark twist. Previous shows include parodies like no other such as a Games of Thrones burlesque by the name of Dames of Throne and The Empire Strips Back, a hugely popular Star Wars burlesque. And although we’ve not yet experienced Russall’s past shows, we sure want to after seeing Jaded Vanities.

It’s certainly nothing you’ve ever seen before, as the night begins with a large stone toilet centrepiece and an alluring naked dancer sitting on/dancing around it. As if that wasn’t enough, the toilet – out of nowhere – grows a tongue that reaches out from the toilet bowl and you can only guess what happens from there!


Jaded Vanities onstage.

Guests were asked to cover themselves in a giant plastic sheet for the next act, being warned of “getting a little bit wet”. As the host wheels out a wheelbarrow with what appears to be a body inside, no one quite suspects what will happen next. A creepy naked woman starts to writhe and wriggle out of the wheelbarrow, covered in grimy mud and dancing using strange yet questionably provocative movements.

Jaded Vanities has a seductive and talented male performer too, performing skillful aerial acrobatics and acrobalance – a little something for the ladies of the audience to woo over.

There is no doubt the Jaded Vanities are a weird, sensual and ominous collection of bizarre figures, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. They awaken the deepest, darkest memories of your imagination and offer an inherently unique experience – one you will never forget.

Jaded Vanities is showing until the 13th of March, so be quick to order tickets here. You will not regret it!

We rate: ★★★★ 4/5 stars


Images: Russall S. Beattie Website

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